I won the Area contest!

I won first place in the area level of competition for the Toastmasters Humorous speech contest on Saturday!! I did my "Prague" speech and while I didn't get as many laughs as I have gotten in the past, it was still a technically flawless presentation. I'm very happy with my delivery.

The contest hierarchy goes as follows: 1) club level, 2) area level, 3) division level and finally 4) district level. The Division contest is in two weeks!

I also won 2nd place in the TableTopics category. TableTopics is a 1-2 minute impromptu speaking competition.

I marvel at how far I've come this year. Learning to be a better public speaker was a New Year's resolution that I've actually kept. Back in January, I was terrified to get in front of a crowd....now, I can't wait! Quite a change in attitude.

On To Division!

When the police interrupt your speech...

After yesterday's debacle, I tried once again to practice my humorous speech before a group of unsuspecting Toastmasters.

I was in a restaurant banquet room and just getting to my first punch line when four policemen walked in and sat down, which of course EVERYONE noticed.

I didn't miss a beat, I pointed to an elderly courtly lawyer who was sitting in front of me with one of those emphysema oxygen bottle breathing machines and said "Officers, if your looking for Mr. Smith he's right up front here, but he swears the waitress told him she was over 18 last week!"

(side note: these officers had all failed the oral portion of a promotion exam and the promotion board told them that Toastmasters might be good for them. Big ole brave policemen had to come as a group to muster up enough courage to do this together!!)

Murphy's law when giving a speech

I was visiting a Toastmasters club last week to practice the speech I plan to give at the upcoming humorous speech contest. Two-thirds of the way through my speech, I hear a very obnoxious cell phone go off...I try to ignore it.

A woman opens up her purse and pulls out the cell phone...Good LORD that is one LOUD ringtone.

She opens up the phone and says "Give me a moment please..."

Eyes are turning to her...I'm getting to the "funny" part of my speech....

She gets up to leave the room...and knocks over an elderly man sitting two seats over...."oh I am SOO SORRY!"

more eyes turning...I should've stopped right then.

She is still jabbering on her phone "honey...honey...wait just a minute until I leave the room.."

To leave the room she has to walk right in front of me. She limps so she moves very very slowly....

I've lost 50% or more of the audience at this point...

She says "Honey...stop crying, I can't understand you..."

Now EVERYONE has lost interest in whatever I had to say and is watching her.

My speech falls flat. Bleh.